Potholes and Patches

 Lately I've been contemplating about what I've been doing with my life. Not so much that I feel like I have no idea what I'm doing, more like how am I preparing for my future. Sure I may be on the right path and really know my strengths and weaknesses. But how sure am I about those things? I honestly, don't know. My greatest weakness is putting others before me, and knowing how to be selfish without the guilt. I work in a field where I put my athletes and clients first. Then worry about myself after I close the door and walk to my car. Ever since identifying this issue prioritizing has been a challenge. I could say that I've made some progress but there's always room for more improvement. I know what my strengths are: I listen to others pretty well, I am understanding, patient, affable, and I work really well with my hands. My hands are my prized possessions. I did wonder if there's a way to insure them... Jokingly. I'm sure there's a way but that's not my priority right now.I'm trying my best to be more aware of myself and trying to figure things out.  I need to take care of myself to be happy. Maybe I am happy and don't know it. Maybe I just need to stop living in the future and live in the moment, living in the now so to speak. I have a bad tendency to be way over my head and not realize what the hell I'm doing in the present. Not having awareness in my present is a terrible feeling. I open my eyes and ask, "how far did I drive?" without knowing if I zoned out or just left my presence temporarily (luckily, I was driving in smooth traffic).
 
 I am nervous about making decisions for my future... I know one thing for sure that I can't wait to have a future with Jonathan. Outside of that I have no idea what I'll be doing. I asked myself tonight "In 5 years what do you think you'll be doing?" as if I'm interviewing myself. My answer: the hell if I knew. I wish I knew how to answer that but I don't. Oh well. I have other things to take care besides worrying about my future. For instance, maintaining this blog.

 So my fitness lifestyle is going well but at the same time I have slumps. This week has been interesting, there were times where I didn't feel like working out or I ate a whole giant bag of Pirate's Booty just because I have no motivation to eat clean or what have you. I don't know, maybe it's this work week on top of last week, I have never been this overwhelmed with Winter season sports before, it's chaotic and discombobulating. Despite my stressful week and a half I'm still getting my ass into the weight room to workout. Yesterday (Tuesday) I challenged myself and managed to do a working set of 3x8reps of 135lbs squats! I thought I was going to have a rough time but I did it!  Yay! That motivated me to stop snacking on shit, get my act together, and eat real food. Now that February is coming up soon I may start measuring my macronutrients and eat according to my goals. I won't call it dieting because I'm eating, not starving myself. My other goal for this year is to do cardio at least 2x/week. Cardio would mean HIIT workouts that last about 20-30min depending on exercises and how many rounds I feel like going. Hopefully I can take some more progress shots soon. I don't have a mirror in my room but there is one in my bathroom with interesting lighting so we'll see. I will say that my arms and shoulders are becoming more and more sculpted. I feel like my limbs and back are getting stronger/sculpted/toned but my mid-section is just lagging. Sigh... I mean it's smaller than it used to be but it's one of those things that is so difficult to work on.

 Anyway, thought I'd share my random thoughts and life "issues" that are occurring but I remind myself to be thankful everyday for a job, a roof over my head, food to eat, to be loved by someone, and to love someone. I hope you're all having a good week! And pray that it'll rain for a good amount of time, the Bay Area needs it big time.

Be healthy!
- Marie

Nomz, I mean, Food for the Day.

Note: All pics taken with my cell phone. Sorry for lack of clarity.


10:50am- Breakfast

1/4C. old fashioned oats + 3/4C. water 

sprinkled w/ cinnamon and about a tbsp of agave nectar

1 peach- peeled and sliced. 

3:35pm- Lunch (too hungry to take a picture)

16 oz. water + scoop of whey protein
1 nectarine

4:40pm- "Snack" Meal

2 boiled eggs

I ate one whole and the other egg white only. 

5:57pm- "Meal" #4

2 Cups air popped popcorn (no flavoring or other stuff added)

7:38pm- Dinner 

Egg drop chicken soup via Oxygen Magazine (yeah... it looks like goop/crap, it's cuz of the egg that I added at the end when warming it up in the saucepan..)

2 Cups or a bowl worth. 

small bowl of edamame

I don't count calories. It's a pain in the royal ass to do so. I eat certain sized portions instead. I will eat small throughout the day but at multiple times that way I can maintain energy levels and get rid of cravings, especially during the afternoon. I usually eat a larger meal for dinner so that I don't eat before I go to sleep. For the soup it tasted pretty... bland, to be honest. And that's the point: to eat clean. No added sugars, flavoring, or sodium. Just food in it's wholesome form. Okay, yea it looks gross buuuut it's because of the egg.... I didn't realize how goopy it made the soup as I heated up. Whoops. 


Oh, I also squeezed in a quick 12 min workout consisting of 2 exercises then counted the number of sets I did in that time period:
divebombers into squat jump + sumo squat twists = 26 sets. I think I will set a short term goal of trying to do 50 at the end of the month. 


Hope this helps!  


- Marie

Just a Start

Most women at my age blog about beauty/make up, fashion, and food, and other girly things but mine is different. I decided to create this blog as a way to express my journey, not to become skinny, but to become the fittest I’ve ever been in my life. A week ago or so I had decided that I want to “grow” a 2 or 4 pack by the time my birthday comes around in February. Quite frankly, it makes sense because I'm making a realistic goal. I’m 24 years young, full time grad student, part time certified athletic trainer, full time daughter and girlfriend. With the help of my boyfriend, who helped me become passionate about fitness, he has changed my views about finding the balance between weight loss and being fit.

See, there’s a difference between “skinny” and “fit.” When I think of being skinny I think of being unhealthy. Why? Because there are fine print that comes with such a goal. There’s your psychological and physiological battle within your self once you look at your self in the mirror and compare it with that model in Vogue ad. Some women experience body dysmorphia, anorexia, bulimia, and other eating psychological disorders. Why do we women do this to ourselves? For social approval? Or to fight the voices in our head that say “Don’t let other people see you eat!” This torture is deadly. There was an article where it found celebrities who regret getting plastic surgery which included Tara Reid with a messed up stomach after getting a tummy tuck because she wanted to have a sculpted abs (http://www.thefrisky.com/photos/357-12-stars-who-regret-having-plastic-surgery/plastic-surgery-regrets-g8-jpg/). Again, the easy way out is presented here. We have more to live for than being skinny… We should strive to be healthy! Even if it’s just to smile and laugh.

Now, being fit is different. I, myself, have been active for most of my life, from participating in sports from elementary to high school, taking up running at one point, taking a cardio kickboxing class, and a bunch of other stuff. Back then I wanted to be “skinny.” I wanted to feel beautiful in everything that I wore, but most of all I wanted to feel… happy with myself. Throughout high school and college I never really was happy with the way I looked. I hid behind baggier clothes and displayed myself as a tomboy. This lead me to a handful of times were I would breakdown because I was so frustrated with lack of results and progress. Today, with the help of my very supportive boyfriend, I have been lifting weights for about a year and a half. Through YouTube I have also found additional exercises to make my workouts more stimulating and challenging instead of boring and routine. Within the year and a half I have more definition in my upper arms, shoulders, legs, calves, and reduction of … stuff in my belly. Even my jean sizes have decreased! Never have I seen a 6 until I bought a pair of khaki’s that I needed for work. But… then I realized that this one pair of jeans that I’ve had for quite some time has been a 6…. whoops. haha. 

Another big key to this journey is my diet. When women think of diets, more often than not it’s a bell that rings “short cut!” Becoming fit, healthy, and happy is no short cut. Eating clean has been very helpful with my goals. Buying produce at the farmers market is the best for you, your wallet, and the local economy. Looking up various recipes you want to try out is always an experiment because you can always tweak them to your liking. You can get very creative with your diet. Why spend money on fad diets that may just end up discouraging you even more because it’s not what is RIGHT for YOU? Clean eating is essential. For example my typical day would look like this:

Breakfast- scrambled eggs (one whole egg, 2 egg whites), a serving of old fashioned oatmeal sprinkled lightly with cinnamon, and a small bowl of blueberries or fruit.
Mid-Morning meal: Multigrain crackers w/ goat cheese and slices of tomato
Lunch- Protein shake (one scoop of whey protein) in 16oz of almond milk, and fruit or veggies
Afternoon meal: Whole wheat bread + thin layer of almond butter
Dinner: 2 sides of veggies (salad and roasted veggies), a serving of protein (chicken/beef/pork/fish), and a serving of complex carbs (Brown rice).

I’m supposed to be eating 6 “meals” in a day but it’s difficult to be honest. I would’t throw myself to start eating that much on day one, I gradually get myself there. But you should know that when your body is hungry, FEED IT WITH THE RIGHT STUFF! I fulfill my cravings with raw almonds, or whole grain pretzels, or a homemade granola bar. I drink a lot of water. I drink water wherever I am; while I’m studying, working, eating, breathing. Water is so essential to the human body and it helps flush out your system to keep it clean and functioning. 

So, I will be posting workouts, times, food/meal plans, recipes, rants, raves, and other things about my workout/fitness life and goals. I may throw in some beauty tips or whatnot. Hey, I'm a woman and would like to share some tips too, nothing wrong to feel beautiful right? Women are strong, we have brute strength inside and out, and, most of all, we are beautiful; which is how I came up with the name of my blog. Thanks for reading! 

Pic taken 9/8/2011